Clean Up My Mess

Hey....you know we can be very hard on ourselves. We often think about all of the things we have said or done wrong. We think about our failures and past mistakes. We wreck our brains with the same questions. What if I did this differently? What if I chose this guy? What if I did not say this? Well maybe you don't, but I will admit, sometimes I do.

You might even replay the sin that may be currently happening in your life.  You might begin to feel bad and unworthy of moving forward in Christ. Always remember condemnation is from the enemy, conviction comes from God. When I am convicted, it inspires me to change, and I don't feel bad. I just feel as if God is speaking to me and leading me to change something.

When I am condemning myself, that is when the negative thoughts come in. I start thinking things like, well I can't join this ministry or talk to this person about this...because I am currently in this. I have even heard people say things like they don't feel ready to move forward with God because of some habit they have in their life that God might not approve of. Honey, honey, honey!!!! God will meet you right where you are. If we wait until everything is perfect in our lives, then we will be waiting forever.

Sometimes it starts with an intentional decision! It's not always about waiting around until we FEEL like doing something. If I relied on my feelings- nothing would get done. Honestly sis, I often FEEL like lounging all day, eating ice cream, and playing on my I-phone, but I make an intentional decision to get up, go to work, take care of my son, etc. Your feelings will catch up with your intentional decision eventually.

The funny part about it is, God is not even focused on all of our silly sins. Once we ask for sincere forgiveness, he has moved on! Yes honey! We are stuck like chuck, but God has moved on! Honestly, I think when we are all messed up, we are the perfect candidates for God to use. People can truly see the glory of God, when he heals or changes a person.

Jeremiah 18:6:  Oh Israel, can I not do to you as this potter has done to his clay? As the clay is in potter's hand, so are you in my hand (NLT).

See? God can mold us! Then he can get all the glory! We just have to rely on him.

A person with problems is real, relate-able, and relevant today. If you are too perfect, you need to exit stage left- immediately. Think about all the people God used in the bible. The Samaritan woman, the great Apostle Paul, Peter, Kind David- I mean the list goes on and on.

Philippians 1:6: And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns (NLT).

He is not just going to leave you right where you are! He will continue working on you until it is finished. That makes me feel good to know that he is not done with me yet. He isn't going to leave something halfway done like us humans tend to do. He is not just going to drop you like a bad habit. Completion!

People tend to see your mistakes, your past, your drama, and your faults, but God sees something different.
Everyone cannot see where God is taking you.   You cannot place your hope and trust in humans, including yourself. They are inconsistent and fickle. God sticks by you in your drama.


Now I don't know what is keeping you from moving forward or sharing your story, but he will get you right together, but in the meantime, you need to keep going to church, keep studying the word, and keep encouraging others. Maybe your past is full of sin. Maybe you did drugs or slept around. Maybe you have a sorry guy you deal with, honey, whatever it is- he can use you. Maybe your present is full of sin. Some of you are probably thinking that you don't have any of these problems, but maybe you are just a mean person. Maybe you are judgmental, or a gossip, or stuck-up. Either way, God invites you to come settle it with him. He is not looking at all of your past and current transgressions. You would be surprised at what happens when you come closer to him, some of that old mess begins to just fall off-in DRAMATIC ways. I just get so excited knowing that he cleans up messes.

                                                 

Isaiah 1:18: "Come now, let's settle this," says the Lord. "Though your sins are like scarlet, I will make them as white as snow." "Though they are red like crimson, I will make them as white as wool." (NLT)

The Most Intimate Relationship a Girl Can Have

Many people have asked me how do I spend time with God....What does it look like? Where? How does it sound? How often do I do it? Just a ton of questions!!!

Honestly, there are several different ways I spend time with him. There is no one way. My way may differ from others, but there is no specific, correct way.  Hopefully some of these pointers will help someone. 

First, let me start off by saying, when I initially began to spend time with him, I felt that it was out of duty and obligation, and I don't think God desires that for us. I would try to do it at night time, after I have given myself to my son, my students, my family and friends, and honestly I would fall asleep! I was over it honey! 

So I poured my heart out to him one day, and asked him to reveal himself to me and give me a strong, continual desire to seek him.  I started to seek him in the morning, before I did anything. I would get up about an hour earlier than normal and pray, journal, talk to him, and read devotionals. Before I knew it, I felt as if I couldn't start my day without doing these things! I began to feel dependent on him. Now this doesn't mean that I don't have a day or two that I sleep in, but my desire for him began to increase every day. 

I pray before I spend time with him. I also journal to him and speak to him. When I journal, I write down all my problems, successes, failures, feelings, EVERYTHING. Even the stuff I feel uncomfortable about writing. God already knows my thoughts, but when I write, it helps me to release some things. I feel more peaceful afterwards. Instead of venting to any and everybody, I write to him. I can also look back through my journal and see patterns and common denominators. I love to look back and see personal prayers I have written to God and see how they have manifested. I write down confirmations he has given me. It is so exciting just to take peek back sometimes. 

Usually when I spend time with him, I play worship music. Music is so powerful. It moves you! The same way you go to a party or ride in your car and you are moved by a song- it is the same with worship music! It sets a mood or tone! When I am writing I play music, and sometimes I  actually get up and dance. (I am in the dance ministry at my church.) Music is so powerful. Some people are afraid they are going to cry when they play worship music. That's ok! He wants us to pour out to him. 

After I have poured my heart out to him, I sit down and read a devotional. Actually I read several sometimes. Now there are several different devotionals you can choose from. Some of my current reads are "Dear Jesus" by Sarah Young, and "How God Grows a Woman of Wisdom" by Anita Higman. Our Daily Bread is a good one to read too. Devotionals are based on scriptures, so I will go and read the entire chapter of scripture the devotional of the day is based on. 

If I am experiencing a particular problem, I will look up scriptures that are specific to that problem. Then the Lord just leads me to certain places to read, and everyday I am amazed at the things he reveals to me. I use sticky notes to write down things he reveals to me, or I write it in my journal afterwards. Its crazy because sometimes the holy spirit will lead me to a particular book in the bible, and God speaks directly to situations I am facing. When that happens, I get chills and I cry because I just KNOW God is so real and he speaks to us. 

When I read the bible, I use my bible app on my tablet or I-phone because it allows me to read it in several different translations, which provide a better understanding for me. My favorite are the New Living Translation, Message version, Amplified version, New International Readers version, and  the Contemporary English version. 

God is everywhere. I subscribe to newsletters via email and I follow inspirational pages on social media. There are many online bible studies you can do by yourself. We are fortunate to have all these different avenues to use today! 

Many times when I am in my car, I listen to sermons. I will literally ask God to point me to what sermon I need to hear, and he never lets me down! I talk to God in the car like he is a friend. I may look crazy if you pull up next to me, but oh well. 

My dance ministry is an instrumental part of my growth with God. We have different assignments we do,  bible studies, and we fast, pray, and consecrate ourselves often. Every song we minister to has a bible study or scripture behind it. We don't perform, we minister. Once we have learned the choreography, it is our responsibility to go to a deep place and minister through the art of dance. 

Sometimes during my resource break at work, I listen to sermons or music while I am working. Honestly, constantly spending time with God keeps me calm, grounded, and convicted. It keeps me less agitated and snappy with people. Trust me there is a lot I could be snappy about right now! Spending time with him also directs my day. I used to do whatever I wanted to do. Now I ask him how he wants my day to go. You would be surprised at the things he blocks during my day or the opportunities that present themselves! He makes my day smooth, organized, and clear. I am not cluttered and confused. I have even started asking him about small things. If I want to look a certain way, I ask him to make the provision for it and help me with my hair, makeup, clothes, etc.  

If only I knew then what I knew now!!!!!!  Oh the different choices I would have made! 

He desires to be so intimate with you sis......

Bianca :)